Might be the last time… (part2)

:)

hehehe x)

 

remember that night, girl?

lastly...

 

 

 

 

 

To the super six. This is for u individually.

I’ll start with adi cos he’s adi? -_-”

adi, u n me, we can never meet eye to eye. but still so far our friendship still survives. ive nth much to say to u because we just chatted on msn yesterday. so anw, takecare of nadJ. treasure her and make it your life goal to never hurt her intentionally. no girls deserve to be treated the way i was. no girls. and whenever possible, i’ll always takecare of my girlfriends. i’ll screw ur pulsar180 if u ever hurt her. hee. anw, thanks alot for the friendship thus far

to nadJ. you n me have a love-hate friendship going on. sometimes we get mad at each other and sometimes we just cannot be bothered to layan each other’s nonsensical behavior. but still, u have been a really great friend. and im sorry if ive ever intentionally or unintentionally put u aside. i never ever meant to. u mean as much to me as the other super six. so pls put aside all our misgivings about each other and lets remain friends for as long as live permits us to. hidup mati kawan orites.. lol.

to zie. zie zie. i dont know. abt the other night, erm yea. im fine after a visit to the doc. just a mini knock to the head and bruises on my hips. but alls well, i shall try to stop before i end up somewhere i dont wanna be. thanks so much for always saying u’d be there for me to talk to. i know ive never talked to u even tho i needed someone to talk to. its not that i dont want to but like ive said to nadE in the prev post, i never wanted to be your burden. all i’ll ever ask of you is to takecare of him. be there for him. be his good pal. cos maybe someday, he might need you.

to nadE, read below.

to all four of you, this is where i leave you guys. kalau ada silap dan salah, sengaja atau tidak, noni mohon ampun dan maaf. halalkan makan dan minum noni. noni hope that with this, it kinda explains all the misunderstandings, the misconceptions, the misgivings we all ever had.. i never plan to go away without saying goodbye.

so, i just want u four to know what a great time i had with ALL of you thru college and after that. my good and my bad u four hav seen. its been my pleasure having known u four and ive come to realise that i do love u four people. u guys and girls are important to me. and as much as i’d like to bring you guys over to the next chapter of my life, im afraid that i will not be able to move on should i do that cos in u guys, i remember the past. let time do the healing to all of us..

p/s: im dramatic because i was from drama. but this post and the one below comes from the bottom of my heart and its with all the sincerity i could muster up from deep within me..

to faris. in case u will not get my msg tonight. this is for you.

all the things that i took back, it was for a reason. if your heart could bear to leave me for your new love, one day im just afraid that u’d bear to get rid of all the stuffs that i gave you. i left those stuff for u in a special place along with a diary where i penned down our journey of two years. i couldnt keep any of your stuffs not because i dont treasure it. i do but its something i cannot keep for ure not coming back cos u told me u wanted to leave and move on with your new love. i hadta give it back. i kept it thus far cos i tot u were going to be back like u said u would. all the feelings i wanted u to know and not know, they are all in the diary. the stuffs i took back n diary is at number 19 where we always ate our fav staple diet. if u can rmbr..

may we all meet again someday, somewhere.. and when that happens, i hope we’ll greet each other like we’ve just met yesterday.. like there was never a gap in the friendship..

thank you super six

SO LONG AND FAREWELL. MAY WE MEET AGAIN UNDER THE SAME BLUE SKY… *kisses and hugs*

selamat menyambut ramadhan and selamat hari raya all in advance to the four special persons in my life.

may u all rmbr me to be this silly girl

- noni -

Might be the last time…

This is an explanation to some of those who were and still are important to me.

To NadE. Our friendship was supposedly special to me because i really think you are a super nice girl who can be super mean at times. At times laa but itu lumrah manusia kan. Haha. I know i owe u one big explanation even if u dont ask for it cos i know ure not the kind of person who will budge an inch. Thus, im making this first step to explain it to u here.

I know we had this argument about the tuition assignment. It was partly my fault when i did not reply u. Its not that i did that purposely but more of i cannot because i was so bogged down with school, work (at that time) and tuition. You know the reason im working so hard right? I dont have it good like you. Not that its your fault that u have it good. Its just that in life, some people have it good while some just hafta work for it. And i happen to be the latter. Im not complaining tho. Cos its my fault that i couldnt quite manage my schedule very promptly. Alls well that ends well because i finally got to arrange everything proper but i know that in the process i actually hurt u a little and frustrated u. Im sorry. i know i have apologised to u but im doing it again for i really treasure our friendship. Now that brings me to another point.

You might think that if i really treasured our friendship, i would have gone out with u as promised. I know, i know. I am a born procrastinator but i really never meant not to keep my words. I still do rmbr our promised outings. With regards to the previous outing twas cancelled, it was because my lecturer totally sprung a surprise on me. As im new to the whole system, i cannot possibly know how to cheat it and leave class for you. As for the other outings, i really think we need both hands to clap. You hafta remind me and vice versa. Im not making any excuses. I believe i have done wrong and once again, i apologise for everything.

As for doing stupid things and getting into trouble. Yes, im crazy. Yes, i was under undue pressure. Yes, i was stressed. I was alone. Im not blaming anyone for not being there for me. I dont even expect for anyone to be there for me. I just hope u try to at least know that I didnt want to be yours or zie’s burden when i was down. I felt most at ease and accepted when i was hanging out with my ‘other friends’. Because they believe me. They heard my story. And that was all i needed at that time. I know i told u i stopped but i started again. And i did call ur love because i really felt disappointed at that time. And i knew i’d upsetted u abt the tuition so i didnt wanna call u.

I know i promised to tell you my story. But there’s always this part in me that tells me not to for im afraid u’d doubt my credibility especially when im misunderstood for being crazy and untrue.

Now that ive finally found a way to explain myself, i hope that u’ll forgive me. If i was lying about how much i cherished and treasured our friendship, i wouldnt have put my pride down to apologise to u. But this is true and im really not acting all this out for the sake of it. I mean it, im sorry.

- noni -

 

 

 

if you leave – nada surf

 

 if you leave, dont leave now
please dont take my heart away
promise me , just one more night
then we’ll go our seperate ways
we always had time on our sides
now its fadin fast
every second, every moment
weve gotta make it last
i touch you once, i touch you twice
i wont let go at any price
i need you now like i needed you then
you always said we’d still be friends , someday
if you leave, i wont cry
i wont waste a single day
but if you leave, dont look back
i’ll be runnin the other way
Two years went under the bridge
like time was standin still
heaven knows what happens now
you’ve gotta say you will
i touch you once, i touch u twice
i wont let go at any price
i need you now, like i needed u then
you always said we’d meet again, someday
i touch u once, i touch u twice
i wont let go at any price
i need you now, like i needed you then
u always said we’d meet again, someday
if you leave
if you leave
dont look back
dont look back

 

 

 

 

 

u told me u went too far when u toyed with her feelings.. that it seems like u are hooked on her now. fact is, u were too afraid to tell me u already took her to be your girlfriend. u thought i’d kill myself doing silly things just because u have her now. u said u’ll always keep me specially locked in that little corner of ur heart. that i’d always be special. that u wont let ur future gfs say nasty things abt me. n u told me u loved me all along right from the start and even now u still love me, alot. u told me don’t want me to leave your life forever and ever. u asked me to forgive u.

 

remember u promised me two things. to listen to this song till the next morning. and not to be mad at me if one day you couldnt find me or any traces of those two years.

good, cause we did the 3, 2, 1 and u left.. so if u leave, dont look back, i’ll be running the other way..